Making a Hash of the B Word

Don’t fret, this ain’t political; I’m not here to lecture,

I’ll leave those folks with stronger views than mine to come and getch’ya,

It’s not for me to tell you what your opinion ought to be,

Nor is it for me to rant if it transpires we disagree,

It ain’t right that people should vilify anyone with opposing views,

It’s just not practical to argue ’bout every article in the news,

It is possible to live in peace with people who’ve diff’ring ideas,

We have managed to avoid civil war for quite a span of years,

And I have faith in humankind and the people of this nation,

That we will rise above this latest irksome conflagration,

And remember, when all the dust has settled, that we can all be friends,

And just like we were brought up to do, we’ll all make do and mend.

That said, there is one matter that’s really troubling me,

Something you might not consider to be a priority,

But for as long as this debate has raged on whether we’re in or out,

There’s repeatedly occurred an outrage that I must now talk about,

I’ll put it simply, so there’s no risk that I might too complex it,

But for the love of all that’s holy, THERE IS NO G IN BREXIT!

Vexatious though the word might be, at least it does make sense,

That Brexit is a contraction of two other words, and hence,

Together they form a new addition to the English language,

Derived, as so many words have been, from contemporary colloquial adage,

The words that form the basis for this new vernacular,

Begin with “Br” and end in “Exit” and are quite particular,

There are no eggs, there are no zits, there simply is no place,

For smudging words together that bear no relevance to the case,

If listen to this debate all day we all must be compelled,

At least could people make the effort to say it as it’s spelled?

And so you see, my gripe is not political in nature,

When it comes to politics, I am a fairly reasoned creature,

That ain’t the case with grammar, though–with words, I give less flex,

There ain’t two ways to say it, folks; it’s Brexit, with an X!


  1. Awesome poem. I was a bit worried it was gonna get political up in here for a moment.
    The Breg-zit thing is almost as annoying as when people say the letter ‘H’ incorrectly. Or as my Nan always says: “There is no ‘H’ in ‘aitch’!”


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